Tuesday, June 1, 2010

The Road Not Taken

I heard back from the University in Australia yesterday. I didn't get the scholarship... :-(

Boo...! Right? I mean, yes...

Well, I feel very ambivalent about it.

What this basically means is that I can't go to Australia... this year at least. This is because this particular program-- that was for 6 months in Norway-- wasn't covered by US financial aid because of a whole bunch of red-tape reasons.

So, I'm deferring. I don't know if I'm deferring and will actually GO next year, or if I'm just deferring to keep from having to make a decision.

As I'm deferring I'm also transferring my acceptance to a different program -- one that WOULD be eligible for more varied forms of financial aid. So, yes, I'll apply for that aid...

...but... well...

Maybe I'm getting too old for this. The thought of doing all that paperwork, all those visas, all those work permits, packing, moving, finding a renter for my place, figuring out what to do with my dog... (Not to mention Jedi)... well, it's exhausting me.

So, taking a year to figure things out doesn't sound so bad. I plan to read (all those books I've missed for the past 2 years! It's amazing how reading for school kills your desire to read for pleasure!), I plan to write! (This is what my peanut gallery wants me to do... write and earn millions! Ha!), I plan to garden... I plan to do yoga! ... I plan to go to the farmer's market... I plan to take a cooking class... I plan to beat Mario Galaxy 2 on the Wii...

And frankly? That doesn't sound so bad.

All I want now is a new job-- one that will give me the TIME I need to do all of those things! A job in which I can feel challenged and engaged, but not stressed out all the time.

Fingers crossed that with one path barred in front of me another will be shown to me!

4 comments:

mmeperpetua said...

Fingers definitely crossed for you. And, even though we are "three years apart," I think this is te moment when our worlds converge toward a sense of just wanting to read and write and pursue worlds as we want to make them.

Yay for us. :)

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政儒 said...

真正的愛心,是照顧好自己的這顆心。 ..................................................

廖淑凡 said...

好的部落格,希望您能繼續堅持!!!..................................................