Shadier and Shadier!

This is some seriously effed up shit.

So this morning I get not one but THREE phone calls from the "Little Bad Dress Shop." The woman on the other end tells me that they've gone ahead and repaired the rip in the sample dress and "You can't even tell the difference, it's good as new and just perfect." She then proceeds to hard sell me and tries to get me to commit to coming back in and trying it on, asking if I want to put a deposit on it over the phone (um. No thanks.) etc. To get off the phone I tell her I need to talk to my mom.

They offered me the same 10% off as yesterday (though now apparently not charging me for the rip) which brings the dress down from their price of $1238 to $1114... Frankly, not a huge savings for a dress that has been RIPPED and has had a million people trying it on. If it were 50% off that would be a different story... but 10% ? Pheew on that, I spit!

Their entire manner just left me feeling very dirty so I called up another shop that is about 2 hours away-- "Better Bridal Boutique" let's call it. Even over the phone I could tell that the woman at the shop was gobs nicer. She was the owner (Bitchy lady at LBDS was the owner of her shop too.) and she was very helpful.

I told her I was looking for a particular dress. They didn't carry it but they said that they could order it. She then proceeds to give me the info on the dress... "The dress is from the 2008 Spring Collection ... and the MSRP is $1,073."

$1,073, BITCHES!
The "discounted," used, ripped, 2 year old dress was STILL $41 more expensive than buying it BRAND NEW.

My friend Janet is like, "Oh no they didn't! You need to report LBDS to the Better Business Bureau!"

I don't know if I'll do that, but I certainly want to give them a piece of my mind! I know they'll probably call back up but I'm so mad I don't know if I can possibly stay calm and rational when I'm talking to them!

Grrr! What would you do? (Besides order the dress from the Better Bridal Boutique, I mean!) I kind of want to pull a Julia Roberts and go in there and say, "You work on commission, right? Big, big mistake. Huge. I have to go shopping now. Bye, girls!"

Super Shady

This is just a quick post (because I'm living with utter chaos at the moment! Starting a new job on Tuesday... Just wrapped up a conference for 400 people that I just ran this weekend... wrapping up the last tasks for my job... Interviewing for a part-time job tomorrow... Holding an open house for my new job tonight... writing presidential briefings 2 seconds ago... argh! It's a lot. In the middle of all of this I'm trying to plan my wedding. Is that insane, or what?)

First, the GOOD! These super great vases from the Dollar Tree are only... can you guess? $1! Sweet! At Wal-Mart (yes, I do my wedding shopping there, cause I'm FANCY that way...) they were $4.99 each. Beaucoup savings there!

Jedi's dad's friend has a big Hydrangea bush that we can denude for wedding purposes and we'll have candles as well. Not bad, right?

Second, the mildly BAD: I found out our location is going to cost me $400 to rent. SHITE! That was supposed to be FREE! Whaaa! WTF?! And then I have labor charges on top of that. I feel like I was sold a bad bill of goods, but it's probably still cheaper than most other comparable places, I guess. It's got a patio overlooking a lake, etc. As long as the weather is good, should be great. If the weather is crappy, the interior is like a hunting lodge-- so not my style. Urgh.

Thirdly, the idiotically BAD: The local store I wanted to order my dress from can't get it because the designer has a non-compete and the other store (where I tried it on, but the owner was a horrible bitch) is 30 min away. Ugh. So, I call the store 30 min away and talk to them about putting down a deposit...

The owner tells me that the deposit ($200) is non-refundable. Fine, whatever. THEN she tells me that the deposit doesn't guarantee that my dress will be available to order at the time I want to order it-- (February... since I am hoping to get down a few pounds. Ahem.) It has to be ordered in Feb. because it can take 16-20 weeks for the dress to come in. Okay... but again, if I wait until February, there's no guarantee that I can get that dress... and I also won't be able to get my money back from my deposit. (How does that make ANY sense.)

(All this time, I'll point out, the owner is talking to me as if I'm a particularly slow 5-year old. DOES NOT make me want to order from her shop!)

She then says that she could sell me the floor sample that I tried on at a 10% discount. I point out that the floor sample is ripped and she says that she can have that fixed, but that she'll have to charge me-- an amount basically equal to 5% of the dress.

What the fuck???

I ask if that's the best she can do on the price if I were to take the floor sample and she says yes.

So, now I'm harboring a sneaking suspicion that this particular dress is not selling particularly well if she's willing to let go of the floor sample. Since she has proven herself to be rather bitchtastic, I wouldn't put it past her to be totally shady as well. I'm wondering if she wouldn't take my money for the full price of a NEW dress and then have the sample dress repaired and then try to pass it off as the dress that was ordered. SUSPICIOUS!

I totally don't want to order from her, but ordering from various websites seems super sketchy too! Argh! Don't know what to do. The only other shop that carries this designer is 2 hours away. SO ANNOYING! If I do go with this shop, how do I make sure I'm not getting screwed/getting the sample dress???

I would also point out that I wouldn't mind getting the sample dress.... if it was marked down 50% or so. But for 10% off? And then I have to pay for repairs? And alterations on top of that? Forget it!

(Oh! I almost forgot to mention the SUPER SUPER GOOD! Jedi has a job interview on the 19th!!! Keep your fingers crossed! This would be so good for him!!!)

THE dress.

Npapaya was kind enough to go dress shopping with me last weekend. While down in the "Big City" I had 3 appointments with three different shops.

Well, let me just say how totally depressing it would have been had I not found THE dress in the very first store we went to. Not only that, it was also the very first dress. Thank God! The saleswoman was actually nice-- she was like an angel sent from heaven,-- tragically that was also her last day. (Probably because she was too nice. The store owner was a horrible bitch to her while we were there.)

This is THE dress. I'm not posting a pic on here because Jedi doesn't want to see it... and since he sometimes checks the blog... well... Better that it be a link.

I was SO happy to find that dress. When I put it on I just KNEW that was the dress. I felt gorgeous in it, it has everything I was looking for, it's the right color, it has straps, it is "different" -- it's old-fashioned yet not fuddy-duddy... I just LOVE IT!

Ok, it's a little out of my price range... ahem... by, um, about $700... But, in the grand scheme of things that's actually not so much, I think.

I do have to tell you about the rest of the day though. Ugh! It was so depressing! At the first store I did actually find a couple other dresses that were pretty, but they weren't a "wow." At the second store they only had two fairly fugly dresses and at the last store they had 3 dresses in my size and only one looked halfway decent... and it was really nothing special.

I can't even tell you how excited I am about this dress. First of all, I never thought I would find something that really was "me"... I was pretty sure I'd have to settle for something that was simply ok. Second of all, I feel really pretty in it. Even if I didn't lose a single pound I'd still be thrilled to get married in that dress and I'd feel like the prettiest girl in the room. (Funny thing is-- I actually looked up the dress online and I feel like the dress on the model is totally fugly! I think it's because the model is stick thin and this dress requires curves! If I had just seen the dress in the ad there's no way I would have wanted to try it on.)

Speaking of women with curves, am I the only one who finds "Say Yes to the Dress: Big Bliss" completely offensive? I mean, why do "big girls" have their own show? Are they a separate species or something? Why aren't they integrated into the "normal" show? Are "big" girls not normal? Cause that seems to be what they're implying. Additionally, the women in the ads seem to be exhibiting the worst kind of stereotypical "big girl/diva" behaviour, saying things like, "Mmmm... my curves are so juicy... Girl, if you've got it, work it, etc." (I'm paraphrasing.) Um. Ew. Look, I'm all on board for women who are larger than average having good self-esteem and for being able to find pretty things to wear... but that kind of stuff not only seems to be all about overcompensating but it also is very off-putting. The brides are described as, "Sassy" and "Confident"... doesn't that seem to be code for... I don't know... in romantic comedies the heroine always has a "sassy" best friend-- and often times that's what "big" girls relegated to in real life as well-- as though they're not the heroines of their own lives. That's what this offshoot show sort of feels like-- You're not good enough to be on the show with the "real" heroines... everyone knows you're "different."

Anyhoo-- that's how I sort of felt about that.

But yea! I found my dress! Yippee! (Now I live in fear of them discontinuing it! I'm going to put a deposit down now, but they won't actually do my measurements until March... that's a long time!)

Amazing blog

Any mommy bloggers out there? I know some of you used to stop by.

I wanted to share the most AMAZING blog I've come across in awhile. It's a kid's craft blog and the woman who runs it is obviously a freaking crafty wizard... and her kids are filthy wizards... hee...

http://www.filthwizardry.com

I'm going to make Jedi take note. When he's a stay-at-home dad there won't be any slacking off! I expect one project a day! ha!

I can't get no satisfaction...

I just quit-- I should be happy, right?

I mean... I am... I guess. I just don't feel happy. Does that make sense?

I'm sure it doesn't, actually.

*sigh*

You know how scientists say people have a natural "set point" for happiness? Well, maybe this is mine. Maybe I'm just inclined to always feel a bit of malaise. Maybe I'm just a big whiny baby. I don't know.

I was actually feeling fine up until a few minutes ago when I got an email from my soon-to-be boss' boss. There was NOTHING bad in the email... but she pointed out that I should have maybe waited to ask my soon-to-be-boss for permission to do something so that it didn't seem like I was going over her head.

*sigh*

Why that should trigger a downward spiral, I'm not sure-- Maybe because I'm so used to being micro-managed where I am? Maybe because I'm used to my ideas and initiatives being shot down where I am? It just left me doubting my decision-- have I moved from one untenable situation to another?

Logically I know that's not the case. This woman responded perfectly nicely and was sure to couch her mild rebuke in between lots of flowering praise for taking initiative. That's worlds away from the situation I'm in now, so I know it's not the same thing.

I can't help feeling as though it is though.

I'm also a bit disappointed and hurt that my future MIL isn't going with me on the latest dress shopping excursion. I know that's stupid since she's been shopping with me 2x now, so I know it's not personal... again... it still feels that way though.

I have to say, I'm damned lucky that I have Jedi and that he is as constant and effusive in is praise, love, and admiration for me (to a nauseating degree sometimes). And no, I don't think it's because we're in a "honeymoon" period-- That's just frankly his personality. It's a nice contrast to my own gloomy-gus attitude most days.

Good thing I'm going to therapy tomorrow since I'm obviously a basket-case.

Well THAT was anti-climactic!

So, remember that thing that I mentioned that I was afraid to jinx? Well... things might still be jinx-able... (KNOCK ON WOOD)... but I'm hoping things are set.

I got a new job! Yippee, right?! I'm going to go and be... well... I was going to say specifically sort-of what I'm going to be doing, but that will make me too traceable. Gotta keep some semblance of privacy! Let's just say I'm going to go and be an assistant director in another department.

So, here's where the scary/jinxable part comes in-- I don't know what I'll be making yet (I KNOW! I KNOW! But I've been assured of the minimum at least... It may seem stupid to do it this way but our HR department is totally ass-backward and has been dragging their feet for 2 months on this paperwork already...) and... It's an acting position for a year.

That last part really does make me feel quite nervous, but I feel like it's a calculated risk. I've been reassured numerous times that I'm the person they want permanently in this position but because HR is so backed up (3 month lag time to even POST positions, nevermind interview (another 3 months) and then HIRE (another 1-2 months....) Well, they wanted someone in this post ASAP since we're starting the new school year and this was the most expedient way to do it.

However, I'm always mindful that there could be some newly minted Ph.D in the field of this department who swoops in and grabs this spot... life has no guarantees... but, as I said, it's a calculated risk. I've been unhappy in my current office for awhile (Their priorities are totally out-of-whack... think "The Office.") and this is a step up and in the direction I want to go. I feel like even if I only end up doing it for a year it will be good experience/a stepping stone.

The other nerve-wracking point is that I'm not the ONLY person in an acting position! My boss and my boss' boss (and my boss' boss' boss... come to think of it) are all also in acting positions! This house of cards could go crumbling at any time! The person who will be my direct supervisor for the coming year really is only temporary as she'll be doing 2 jobs at once-- they're going to be hiring for a permanent position in the spring... While I know I enjoy the people in the office I'm going to it's also a bit scary not to know who my boss will ultimately be.

So, what was the anti-climactic part? The giving notice part, of course. Why? Because one can't simply say, "Take this job and shove it!" Even if that IS the underlying sentiment! One has to make-nice in order not to be black-balled in this -oh-so-small community and say, "Thank you very much for the opportunities I've had here, I've really enjoyed it, and I'm sad to be leaving..."

Not that I had many doubts about leaving of course, but when they announced my departure at a staff meeting today it only solidified my resolve. Only 2 people came to say they were sorry to see me go... everyone else was very "Meh." about it. It's not like I haven't been the invisible girl here anyway. Why would I suddenly become visible when I leave?

The place where I'm going to I definitely feel "Seen"-- the Director (my boss' boss) is fantabulous and she's been great throughout this process. She's just really very effusive and encouraging and has bent over backwards in a lot of ways to make me feel welcome. It's a totally different environment. (Not that every office doesn't have it's dysfunctions, but this one has fewer than most on campus.)

Fingers crossed that it will all work out for the best in the end.

I'm still keeping my fingers crossed (hopefully you will too?) for Jedi and some other friends who are looking.

What a difference a year makes...

A year ago (tomorrow) Jedi and I will have been going out for 1 year.

I mean, technically we didn't start going out exclusively until sometime in October (I can't really remember when) but we did meet one year ago tomorrow.

Who could have guessed, right? In this post from a year ago you can see I didn't really have high hopes. If you had told me at this point last year that this year at the same time I'd be trying on wedding dresses I would have told you that you were clearly insane because-- #1) there's no one to date in my podunk town and #2) there's no way I would move that fast!

This should probably teach me a lesson in making pronouncements of which I feel certain as I'll only end up being wrong. (Dear Universe, There is NO WAY I would ever win the lottery. Especially not $90 Million dollars. Especially not in tonight's Powerball drawing! I dare you to prove me wrong.)

Speaking of shopping for wedding dresses, my mother is giving me the silent treatment since the last debacle in which I yelled at her for being an unsuportive beeotch. (Believe me, she totally is. I swear I'm not just being a Bridezilla or something.)

Npapaya (Yes, she of the "Always Right" fame in the aforementioned post) has been kind enough to agree to go with me to try on dresses on the 25th. We have to go to a town an hour away to try stuff on, but we're going to 3 different stores and each store has 4-6 plus sized samples (wowwee. If we lived in a metropolis I think I know how I could make beaucoup bucks-- open up a plus-sized wedding dress shop.) I'm hoping that each store doesn't have the EXACT SAME DRESSES (as has happened in other locations) but we shall see.

In any case I think that after that shopping trip I will have made up my mind. If I still haven't found anything I like better than #5 I think I will go with that one.

P.S. to Jedi if you ever get around to reading this-- Happy Anniversary, Sugerplum. Mwah!