Thursday, December 16, 2010

10 things I love about you

Now, without further ado... 10 things I love about Jedi

1) He loves me. (Is that cheating to put this up here? Maybe... I don't care!) Jedi is so overwhelming in his love that it's impossible for me not to be sure of it. Every word, every action reassures me. And yes I do need that reassurance. Because of my own upbringing I find it so hard to believe that anyone could love me -just as I am-- and I still find it astonishing that he does.  When I'm sick, and grumpy, and haven't showered in 3 days... amazingly, he still loves me.

2) He's a boyscout. Literally (he's an eagle scout!) and metaphorically. He has such a strong moral compass... (and fortunately that compass wasn't all tuned by the BSA either... He's a complete believer in equality for lgbt folks.) That's not to say he can't see things in shades of grey-- but let me also say that one of my favorite things to do with him is watch reality tv shows. He gets morally indignant every time some idiot on Teen Mom won't stop playing the video games and go change a diaper. (In fact, he was even more indignant when the same idiot went and bought a video game system instead of diapers... coming from a hard-core gamer who has about 6 systems, I think that's a pretty good indication his priorities are still in order. :-)

3) He is very resilient. I know he probably wouldn't characterize himself this way, but I think it's true. He had a pretty rough start in life. His mom remarried and her husband adopted Jedi, but he's had a lot of conflicts with his adopted dad. His dad loves him, I know, but I think he was often jealous of the amount of time Darth would spend on Jedi and would take it out on him. I've seen them interact even recently and this dynamic comes out. There have been times Vader has been physical with Jedi, slamming him against a wall, nearly coming to blows.  I bring all that up only to say that in such circumstances a lot of people would have turned mean and angry and violent themselves. Jedi took the opposite route.

4) He is a very gentle spirit. I know, that may sound weird. Men aren't supposed to be gentle, are they? Phooey. And they say it's the feminists who hate men when it's the anti-feminists who impose the tough-guy persona on men.  In many ways he reminds me of my grandmother. There is something about both of them that is very calming and soothing-- just their very presence.  I tend to be very heated, quick to anger, but Jedi can calm me like no one other than my grandmother can do.

5) He's a snappy dresser.  Superficial, but it's true! He's got kind of an old soul and that's reflected in his dressing, I think. He has a fondness for things like fedoras and pin stripe suits. And he looks smoking hot in them. :-)

6) He loves to clean and organize.  Let's just say that the two of us are like Oscar & Felix. How he manages to live with my disorder, I don't know. I have to give him credit-- and thank his incredible patience. But the truth is he LOVES it. I don't think he can think of a better way to spend his time than reorganizing something. He's constantly asking my permission-- "Can I reorganize the cupboards!?" "Can I reorganize the DVDs?"... I enjoy doing my part to keep him happy and giving him lots of things to organize ;-p  And, I always tell him, "This is your house too. Reorganize whatever you want."  Because I'm a giver ... ;-P

7) He's a great brother. He and his sister have a fantastic relationship and he really looks out for her and protects her. (Very different from my own childhood where it was more like Lord of the Flies...) (I do have to point out though that it's kind of easy to be a good brother to his sister since his sister is one of the sweetest girls I've ever met. ha.)

8) He has a good work ethic. He slogged away at a job for several years that he hated.  He could have just quit and played video games all day, but he didn't.  He's struggled quite a bit with school, going to 3 different ones in the past 4 years... but he's not given up and he's almost completed his degree.  I know I complain a lot about him playing video games-- and I know he uses it all to procrastinate a lot-- but the truth is that he does what he needs to do in order to be responsible.

9) He gives without counting.  He doesn't just do this with me-- he does it with everyone. I do think he inherited this trait from his parents.  He helped someone he hardly knew put in floors and drywall.  He gives random people rides home from his school. He helps acquaintances move from a an apartment with no elevator and 4 flights of stairs. He never does anything in the spirit of selfishness-- he is, next to my grandmother, the most unselfish person I've ever met.

10) All the little things... bringing me tea when I wake up... remembering special dates (which I always forget)... being able to finish my sentences... not even minding my grumpy early morning alter-ego... going out of his way to find a certain book I'd been wanting... bringing me lunch... letting me drive his car (most precious possession!) ... insisting I drive his (safer) car during bad weather... remembering my favorite chocolates... always telling me I'm beautiful... always making me feel like I'm the most important person in the world.

Well, ok, maybe I fudged a little. That might be more than 10.

I hope I make him feel the same way. He says I do... but I also know that he is a fundamentally better person than I am.  I know I'm a very lucky girl.  Sure, there are things about him that drive me nuts too... but in the end, those don't really matter. In the end I sure am lucky to end up with him.


Anonymous said...

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: he's a keeper. :)

Hypatia said...

:-) It took me awhile to figure it out, but yes-- he sure is!