Ok, ok I admit it. I was probably just in a grumpy mood in general last night... (I had a lovely conversation with my mother in which she informed me that if Jedi was saying he liked me and thought I was beautiful then he was obviously lying and wanted something from me. *sigh* Yes, I realize these are her OWN issues and that she's projecting, but it's hard to disassociate sometimes.)
So, I was in a grumpy mood about that.... and... also... my own idiocy.
You see, I said the "L" word. And it wasn't "Like." And it just kind of slipped out. (No lectures, please!)
I mean, on the one hand I do love him.... in that way that I love all my really good friends. I even lust after him. I don't think I ***LOVE*** him in the romantic sense (of happily-ever after & fairies & magic) way that I think HE means it when he says the "L" word.
Sooooo.... Ahem. I guess it would be kind of awkward to take it back, huh? Ahem. This morning when he said, "I love you," and I responded with "Thanks," I think he was kinda dismayed.
Yeah. So. Um. Not quite sure what to do about that.
I really needed to be alone last night but he came over because he'd forgotten something at my house. And as seems to happen, when he stops over I let him STAY over because I'm totally a sucker. (And oh, did I mention I lust after him?)
But I was grumpy. He wanted to have a deep and meaningful talk... (um, while we were getting busy...) and I nearly kicked him out he was being so annoying.
I think I just need alone time for the next few days.