Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Total Acceptance

One of the things I love the most about Jedi is his complete and total acceptance of me. It would be too far to say it's "unconditional" love, but so far I've not found any conditions on it.
(The only thing he seems to have trouble accepting is being apart from me which is, admittedly, effing annoying, but so far has not crept into stalker-controlling territory.)

There's nothing I can't say to him, he's totally fine with what I look like (even especially naked... which is something I never thought would happen), he doesn't ENJOY my bad moods or my depressive ones, but he's still there telling me I'm wonderful, and oh-btw-is there anything he can do for me... He overlooks my messes, he watches my trashy tv shows, he calms my fit of pique when I'm unable to string christmas lights...

All in all, I don't think I've ever met anyone who is as calm and mellow as he is. He is also, evidently, devoid of any personality disorders (even the small neurotic ones... and everyone has some of those! At least, everyone ELSE I know does...)

You'd think it would be easy accepting that kind of open love, admiration and affection... but it's not. It's really, really not. (because of my OWN neurotic tics... ha!) But the comfort he brings me has allowed me to be more open than I ever thought I could be with someone, and more myself than I ever thought I could be-- and it's still ok.

He likes me. He likes me just the way I am.

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