Sunday, January 4, 2009

In Case You Were Wondering

Here are some reasons why you might be single courtesy of Time Out New York!

(Ummm... yes, in the interest of full disclosure one (or more!) of these things apply to me, and I know it. I'll let you guess which ones they are...!)

Also, Feel free to add your own reasons in the comments section!


Because you’re desperate

Because you’re afraid of commitment

Because you love the sound of your voice

Because you’re too shy

Because you’re too controlling

Because you’re cheap

Because you just got dumped and have pledged never to love again

Because you have too many roommates

Because you’re allergic to everything

Because you’re overweight

Because you’re obsessed with your pet

Because you only speak in catchphrases

Because you have bad breath

Because you’re a straight woman who only goes out with her gay friends

Because you’re a gay man who only goes out with his straight friends

Because you can’t get over your ex

Because your voice could cut glass

Because you have no style

Because you’re a gal who can’t stop dating musicians

Because you only like people who don’t like you

Because you’re in love with yourself

Because you’re secretly gay

Because you work till all hours

Because you’re a guy who’s too nice

Because you party too much

Because you don’t drink

Because You drink too much

Because you’re ugly

Because you’re too pretty

Because you blog about everything

Because you have a kid

Because you’re a short and skinny guy

Because you look like the Gotti kids

Because you’re addicted to sex

Because you hate yourself

Because you’re too close to your parents

Because you’re too picky

Because you’re too judgmental

Because you’re a homebody

Because you’re so damn angry

....And that’s why you’re single!

Whenever anyone you know exemplifies any of the categories above, take a sharp pencil, point it at them and say, “And that’s why you’re single!” It’s catchy and works for anything.

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