Monday, January 19, 2009

Mistress Mary, Quite Contrary...

I took the day off of work today, which was a good decision, I think. This is apparently the most depressing day of the year, btw. I'm a little down... I just couldn't get the gumption to go in to the office today.

I met Science Guy for lunch (after his insistence yesterday that he wanted to see me.) It was perfectly nice, I enjoy his company. (I would also like to point out that he insisted on paying... which, in this circumstance a "friend" would not normally do, I think.) Again, his attentiveness is a nice contrast... to muckraker.

Seriously though, how fucked up is it that even though Science guy has shown in actions how vastly superior he is to muckraker... I'm still pining after muckraker. AARRRGGGHH!

I'm reminded actually about how when I was casually seeing Atlas how much I preferred Science guy to him. And now that (I guess?) I'm casually--kinda--? seeing Science guy, I prefer Muckraker to him. I have issues, I know! Apparently I'm just a contrarian. If Muckraker were paying attention to me and Science guy wasn't, would I be more into science guy?

*sigh* Perhaps, perhaps.

I am so screwed if this is the case as it means I'll never be able to want someone who wants me.

FUCK.

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