Monday, March 23, 2009

Facebook stalking!

I'm back "on" eharmony, but I'm refusing to pay for it. So, I'm getting matched with people, but I haven' t found anyone I'd be willing to pay money to communicate with. Given how few people there are living in my area it's not really worth it. I see an interesting profile about once every 3 months.

Well, I guess this must be month 3. (Hey! It is! March=3! ok, that was lame, I know!) because I saw a profile that was interesting.

I can't see pictures since I'm not paying for this, but the guy listed his occupation & company. Well, it's my company, so I looked him up in our directory, found the department, found his last name, and then looked him up on facebook. It took me all of 2 minutes... not a whole lot of stalking involved! (And to all those people who think they're anonymous out there? You're not. Not really. (especially not in THIS tiny town!))

Guess what? He was pretty cute.

And now I have a dilemma. Do I contact him using my 'insider'-- ill-gotten email address? Or do I just send him a free 'wink' and hope he contacts me?

(Npapaya points out that he may be playing the same game I am, and thus can't see my picture, and so may never respond to my 'wink.')

I sent him the wink, but Npapaya got me thinking that maybe I should email him. But that's a little too stalkerish, isn't it??? I mean, wouldn't YOU be creeped out? (As a girl, I know I would DEFINITLY be skeeved out by a guy who contacted me that way. I wouldn't feel safe. Is that a terrible double standard? Or just the way of the world?)

So-- What would you do? Would you cop to the facebook stalking and contact him through the corporate directory? Or just wait until he answers (or not!) the 'wink'?


arf said...

Two things:
(1) what's there to lose?
(2) There's a total double standard, and your coworker might very well be flattered. I mean, it's a pretty fun work-around the paying for a service that is normally not useful to you.

If he's skeeved, it's kinda his own fault since he put all of that information on the internet (and intranet) waiting to be found.

Plus, you'll have to cop to having looked him up at some point even if you do go through "proper" eH channels. It's better than the alternative - I once had a ridiculously awkward (first and only) date with a guy whose website I'd read because a girlfriend of mine had googled him. I couldn't remember what I'd read and what he'd been telling me in emails. Bad scene.

Hypatia said...

Oh-- I've done that "I can't remember what I've read, and what you've told me" thing before. AWKWARD!

Ok. I did it. I took your advice (and a couple other people's).

You're right? If I don't go for it. Nothing will happen. If I do go for it and he doesn't like me-- same result, right?

Hell, why not go for it then!