Sunday, June 21, 2009

Something in the stars? Or just in the water?

As I mentioned, I'm getting all sorts of random calls this week.

Science guy is suddenly in touch again, as I mentioned. He wants to get together, which I felt rather ambivalent about. Again, I'm not sure what he's after since he's been all, "I want to be friends!" but is also, let's hang out at my place and rent dvds... (Which, hmmm... doesn't that usually lead to making out? Hmmm...)

I think I'll give him another shot though. His good qualities do outweigh his few douchey lapses, I think. He always does make me feel better about myself, he is very kind, and he is thoughtful (most of the time.) I don't think anything will go anywhere, but I wouldn't mind a little human contact these days, so-- well, why the hell not.

Muckraker on the other hand? I think he has gone of the deep end. Perhaps he always was off the deep end and I had too many stars in my eyes to notice (Um, and I can hear Npapaya saying, "DUH!")

After he called me several days ago (and might I add, he called me three times. On my work phone. After I made it clear I couldn't talk.) I called him back the next day. I figure y'all would be proud of me for not calling him back asap, but the truth is it wasn't calculated. I was tired and I forgot about it until it was too late to call. (I've been working crazy hours for the past 2 weeks and I'm exhausted!)

Unsurprisingly he wasn't calling to whisper sweet nothings, he was calling because he needed something. He is charming, and so I didn't notice it at first, but I do think he's quite a user. I mean, he was asking for advice and recommendations for housing in our area, and it's not a big deal-- not something I would fault a friend for asking-- but that's just it. He doesn't comport himself as a friend or anything else. He contacts when it's convenient, being excessively charming, raising expectations, and then disappearing. And I am SOOOOO over it. You would be proud how much I'm over it.

I was probably rather curt on the phone, but polite enough I think, and offered him my suggestions, and that was that. Or so I thought.

A couple days later I was working in the office I'd been relocated to for the 2 weeks we were doing this --well, conference, is probably the best word for it. I was in the "welcome" center where there was an office on one side and a lounge on the other. I was having lunch with Npapaya when suddenly I spot Muckraker coming out of my office.

Apparently he'd come looking for me. I introduced him to Npapaya (who kept rolling her eyes at him whenever his back was turned.) and we made a bit of small talk. Again, he had come looking for something-- he was looking to find out if someone was attending the conference.

I went to my office and checked the list, and I asked him more about this person. Turns out that he was looking for someone he'd never met before, someone a friend of a friend once knew. WEIRD. I told him he should probably just try and find her on facebook... (instead of stalking her at this conference... mmm hmmm... didn't say that part, but wouldn't anyone find that totally creepy???)

He asked if I would be in his class this summer (yes) and he said he was glad to hear it. And then he left.

Again, Npapaya rolled her eyes at him, and she asked me, "Do you think he was really looking for that woman? Or was he looking for an excuse to come and see you?"

The truth is, I don't know. If he was looking for that woman, that is rather creepy/weird. If he was looking for me, he has had ample opportunities to be in touch before this, and he has not indicated he's interested.

The worst part though? (And Npapaya can stop rolling her eyes!) is I do still find him very attractive. Like, I'm weak in the knees, attractive. (Yes, this is weird, because I'm probably the only one who does think this amongst my group of friends-- the rest of them are like-- "Hands down, Science guy is better looking." But it's less about actual looks I think, and whatever paticular alchemy makes one person attractive to another. There is no reasoning with that, I think.)

But! But! But! Our story does not end there!

This morning I was working on finishing up the last details for the conference--processing payroll, getting payments, and dealing with a bunch of incidents that involved security being called last night. There were about 10-15 people in the tiny space of this office all morning, and it was pretty bustling. That's why I didn't notice Muckraker come in until one of my co-workers (or, co-irkers in this particular case) says to me, "Who was that guy?"

That guy? That I spotted leaving the office? Was Muckraker. Apparently he'd come to my desk and been rifling through papers stacked on it. And then he left. All without saying a word.

I am LIVID. This is so beyond the realm of acceptable behaviour I don't even know where to start.

Perhaps he was innocently (but STUPIDLY) looking for info on this old friend of a friend he was trying to get in touch with. Or, given that in his trade he's a reporter, perhaps he was looking for actual confidential information.

I don't think any confidential info was in the stack on the desk he was apparently looking at, but over the course of this weekend I was working with the private information of both a senator and of a high-profile actress. I'm about 99% certain that while he may have seen lists with their names on it, the confidential info was in my database. But I am SO ANGRY that he put me into that position of potentially being compromised and risking my job.

I don't know what his deal is, but I am completely DONE with him. SO, SO, DONE.

I wrote him an email this evening that basically said, "What the FUCK were you doing this morning!?"

He has yet to respond, but given that it's him, I don't really expect him to. That is, until he needs something else....



arf said...

That's pretty freaky.

I work in a place with 24/7 security, and if that happened to me, I'd make sure that Security knew to not let him in the building.

It sounds like your workplace is much smaller though. I wouldn't let him get away with it. It's pretty creepy.

Hypatia said...

Hi arf-
You and I work in the same "type" of place, I think. We also have security on call 24/7. I don't think this rises to the level of needing to call them, but if it escalates I certainly am not shy to use them.

arf said...

You're way more forgiving than I would be. I'd have PNG'd him immediately after finding that he'd been through my desk after I told him I couldn't help him. It's disrespectful and borderline illegal, given that you work with some confidential material.

(I work in a museum, so to get to our offices you have to go by a guards' desk. I'm not sure what you mean by "on call" but I would have made it such that he couldn't get into my building much less my desk.)

Hypatia said...

I work at a university. Some of our buildings require entry codes, but mine isn't one of them because my building gets a lot of visitor traffic. If necessary I could request security to patrol the building (in some cases of domestic violence they've stationed guards), but this certainly doesn't rise to that level.

He didn't actually ask for help, so I didn't tell him I couldn't help him. He just came in and helped himself. I didn't see him come in until a co-worker asked me about the guy who was leaving and who had been at my desk. I saw him leaving, and recognized him.

I emailed him demanding and explanation. I probably won't get one, but at least I let him know how completely unacceptable I found his behaviour.

Perpetua said...

I was going to say that when a guy is under your skin, sometimes you just have to leave him there. That is, sometimes there's no cure for it but to let it run its course.

But. BUT.

That was BEFORE I read about the desk invasion. What the hell? That is all kinds of creepy, and weird, and wrong.

Hypatia said...

Yes... creepy & wrong... (And even wronger? Is that I'm inclined to overlook it. Because I am an IDIOT apparently. Or, well... because he's gotten under my skin.)